I'm in love with the whole world

I like to thank goodness.
Because Oh! my goodness,
there is just so much of it.
And thank goodness for that.

so far sunday in the afternoon

I awoke this morning with a clattering head, and thought it might settle if I just lay in bed. It did not, and so I got up. Actually, it is not morning but afternoon. That is usual, especially for a Sunday. I am drinking strongly brewed English Breakfast tea, very milky and honey-sweet. Eating bites of oatmeal with apples and cinnamon. Head still pounds, but fading I think. Mooz is intermittently looking out the window and then at me, asking me all kinds of questions with her eyes and I don't know the answer to any of them. I can hear Will mumbling in his half-sleeping state. I feel unsure about where to be in the world today. I can't see the sky from where I sit, only orange bricks going up and up.

a dream

My parents are throwing a party, but they've decided to host it in two locations. One house for the French-speaking people, and one for the rest. They will wait until everyone arrives and then usher some over to the other place. They have prepared a lot of food, but all of it is gross-looking pastry and strange sorts of cheeses, nothing is appetizing. I have been pulled away from my job early, I guess to help set up. My workplace is a giant open stadium where the seats are in rows stacked so steep that you have to hold on dearly as not to fall down the aisles. I can't remember what my job is, but I have been seeking a bottle of some sort. Now I am at the party, and I am trying to be available to socialize. An old acquaintance of mine is talking to me. He's a teacher now, and tells me that he lives out in the country close to here. His hands are very small and fat and his fingers are shorter than my pinkie finger, although he is a very large man. I am listening to him, but when I respond it's as if my mind is far away, and I find myself saying things that don't make sense or which are not true, and immediately I take my words back and apologize for being so rude. My Mum comes to me and gives me a task, "take this toy sword and bring it over to the French house, but be sure that Hunter doesn't get a hold of it. You'll know if you are in a danger zone because the sword will glow blue". So I go off on this mission, and I am thinking to myself that Hunter is only a baby and although he has begun to walk, he cannot go far, and certainly couldn't reach the sword if I put it up high. So I walk into the darkness with it, and in some places it does glow blue, so I alter my path away from there and continue to the French house. My Dad is there and he is eating the pastries, and no one else is there yet. Lined up against the walls are all kinds of toys for Hunter and Callie, and I look at the sword and realize it's just a toy, and so I put it up on a shelf and go back to the other party. There I meet the drag queen from last night who did both Michael Jackson and Jennifer Lopez. Her body is incredible, so convincingly woman. I tell her that, that her performance was very good and she laughs and flicks her hair, and I feel sheepish. I wake up.

this nag champa dream scene

Tom Waits yell-sings over those cranky horns and creaking strings and sounds I don't know, and it makes me feel like the light ought to be bluer in here, and the air a little smokier.

One week of life in the working world under my belt, and I feel just dandy and fine. A nice change to accompany the changing air over here these days. Being awake during the hours when the sun meets the streets in these parts, getting little bits of exposure and just soaking it up and it feels SO good.

Going out later with some lovely people, to a bar where everything is inspired by candy. Once again feeding that old sweet tooth of mine. Swaying around the house again, feeling that lightness and feeling settled, too. Everything hums, pulses along... tuning in to that constant rhythm in everything, tuning my breath and my sighs and my heartbeats and it feels good.